Volcanoes Under Melbourne? By James Reed

     I did not know this, but apparently there are volcanoes under Melbourne. As soon as I read this, I wondered how long for the next eruption, that blows Melbourne apart? Burke Street full of lava, anyone?

“A volcano expert says an eruption could happen in Melbourne at any time. Australian National University professor Richard Arculus said an eruption could theoretically happen in Melbourne or Auckland, New Zealand – but there's no way of pinpointing exactly where or when. 'In terms of Melbourne and Auckland, there's every chance another volcano could blow,' he told Daily Mail Australia. 'You could see lava flowing down Bourke Street. He cited research from Monash University which pointed to a volcanic field existing in Melbourne. The research analysed an 'intra-plate basaltic volcanic field' in south-eastern Australia. Mr Arculus said a similar field exists in Auckland, a city built on and near 52 volcanoes. New eruptions can take place at spots where volcanoes have not previously existed. Mr Arculus said scientists were unable to tell when or where a new volcano would sprout. A chilling video created as part of research into the effect of volcanoes in Auckland shows the effects of an eruption on the city.’

     Yes, and I bet that the ground zero for this will be my flat, just as Putin said that the hyper-missile he has zeroed in on Melbourne, is targeted right to land on my fridge, which has been making a burring noise, and not shutting down, causing me to be extra neurotic about my power bill, and suggesting that I simply eat tin food, or just exist on alcohol. I mean, nukes, volcanoes, the world is a terrifying place, for the hyper-paranoid, that is to say, those who are conscious.



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Friday, 12 July 2024

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