The Great Opt-Out: Women, Work, and the Road to Ruin? By Mrs. Abigail Knight (Florida)

I'm sitting at a café, the kind where the coffee's overpriced and the laptops outnumber the prams. Across from me, a woman in her thirties—sharp blazer, sharper focus—hammers away at her MacBook, her phone buzzing with notifications. She's climbing the corporate ladder, maybe running her own startup, chasing the dream of success that's been sold to her since school. No ring on her finger, no talk of kids, and from the looks of it, no rush to change that. It's a scene playing out everywhere, from Sydney to San Francisco, and it's got people whispering: women don't want marriage, kids, or even men anymore. Careers, cash, and control come first. Is this the end of the nurturing instinct we thought was hardwired? And if it is, are we barrelling toward a social cliff?

The numbers don't lie. In Australia, the fertility rate's been sliding for decades, hitting 1.58 births per woman in 2023, per the ABS, well below the 2.1 needed to replace the population. Marriage rates? Down 31% since 2000, with only 6.1 per 1,000 people tying the knot by 2024. Women are delaying motherhood—average age at first birth is now 31, up from 27 in the '90s—or skipping it entirely. A 2024 OECD report says 20% of Australian women aged 40-44 are childless, double the rate from 1980. And sex? A 2023 Durex survey found 30% of women aged 18-34 report "no interest" in sexual relationships, with many citing stress, work, or just not needing it. Meanwhile, women's workforce participation is at a record 62%, and they're outpacing men in university enrolments—55% of graduates are female, per the Department of Education.

This isn't just Australia. In the U.S., the CDC notes a 2024 fertility rate of 1.6, with 40% of women aged 15-44 never married. Japan's birth rate is 1.2, and South Korea's a dire 0.78, the lowest globally. Women everywhere are opting out of the traditional script: husband, kids, home. Instead, they're chasing degrees, promotions, and that sleek apartment with a view.

Let's talk biology. Evolutionary psychology says women are primed to nurture—millennia of child-rearing shaped hormones like oxytocin, which bonds mothers to babies. Studies, like a 2020 Nature paper, show women's brains light up differently than men's when caring for infants, suggesting a hardwired tilt. But biology isn't destiny. Abortion complicates the picture: 1 in 4 Australian women have had one, per a 2023 Guttmacher Institute report, often citing career or financial reasons. Does this refute nurturing? Not quite. It shows women prioritising survival in a world where raising kids costs $300,000 per child (AMP, 2024) and maternity leave barely covers rent. Nurturing's still there—it's just drowned out by spreadsheets and deadlines.

So what's driving this? Economics, for one. Women's liberation opened doors, but capitalism slammed them into overdrive. A 2024 Grattan Institute study found dual-income households need both partners working full-time to afford a median home in Sydney ($1.2 million). Single women, especially, face a stark choice: kids or financial security. Careerism fills the gap—promotions mean stability, status, a shot at the good life. Social pressures pile on. Instagram's curated hustle, TikTok's "boss babe" mantra—it's a cultural script telling women success is a corner office, not a nursery. Feminism, once about choice, now feels like a mandate to compete, with motherhood framed as a setback.

Then there's the men. Dating's a mess—apps like Tinder churn through matches, but a 2023 YouGov poll says 40% of women find modern men "unreliable" or "immature." Incels and "manosphere" types on X gripe that women "only want Chad or cash," but the data's clearer: women want partners who match their ambition. With men falling behind in education (45% of uni grads) and wages stagnating (male median income up just 2% since 2010, per ABS), many women see marriage as a risk, not a reward. Sex? It's less appealing when trust's low and work's high—exhaustion kills libido faster than any ideology.

Women aren't rejecting motherhood because they're cold; they're navigating a system that punishes it. Abortion's a symptom, not the cause—women terminate pregnancies when society makes parenting feel impossible. A 2024 Lancet study found 60% of women who aborted wanted kids later, under better conditions. Nurturing's not dead; it's on hold, squeezed out by a world where a pram's a luxury item.

Where does this end? Some predict social collapse, and the maths backs this up. Low birth rates mean aging populations—by 2050, Australia's over-65s will outnumber kids under 15, per the UN. That's fewer workers, strained pensions, and a shrinking tax base. Japan's already there: ghost towns, shuttered schools, a GDP flatlining since the '90s. South Korea's projecting "extinction-level" decline by 2100 if trends hold. Social cohesion frays when families fade—loneliness is up (30% of Aussies report it, per a 2024 Lifeline survey), and community bonds weaken without kids tying neighbors together.

Collapse isn't a stretch, but it's not inevitable. Societies have faced low fertility before—post-WWI Europe, Rome's late empire—and muddled through, often via immigration or cultural shifts. But immigration's a sticking point; if native populations shrink and migrants don't integrate, tensions flare, as seen in Germany's 26% AfD surge. A "new Dark Age"? Maybe not medieval, but a fractured, low-trust society is plausible—think declining civic engagement (voting rates down 10% since 1990, per AEC) and rising polarisation.

What happens to women's "brilliant careers" in this scenario? If collapse hits, the corporate castles crumble. A 2008-style financial crash, amplified by demographic decline, could gut industries—tech, finance, consulting—where women now thrive. Supply chains, already shaky (2024 port strikes cost $5 billion, per RBA), could seize up, making urban materialism unsustainable. Rural areas might fare better, but careers tied to city economies? Toast. Women who bet on jobs over families might face a grim irony: no pension, no kids to lean on, and a gig economy that's more gig than economy. Survival will favour adaptability—nurturing skills, ironically, might outlast LinkedIn profiles.

But let's not bury the future yet. Women aren't the problem; the system is. If society wants babies, make them affordable—subsidise childcare, cap housing costs, reward parenthood over PowerPoint. Men need to step up too—get educated, get reliable, be partners, not projects. And women? They'll nurture when it doesn't mean sacrifice. Biology's still there, waiting for a world that values it.

I'm back at the café, watching that woman pack up her laptop. She's not the enemy—she's playing the hand she's dealt. But the deck's rigged, and if we don't reshuffle, we're all folding. Social collapse? It's knocking. The question is whether we open the door or build a better house.

https://nypost.com/2025/04/21/lifestyle/study-shows-women-are-not-getting-married/

"Women have certainly come a long way — no longer feeling the need to put a ring on it due to social or cultural pressures.

It turns out, US women are ditching the traditional idea of marriage — and instead choosing to live their best single lives.

And the proof is in the data — according to a 2023 Pew Research Center survey, almost half of US women didn't view marriage as an important element of a fulfilling life, as reported by the Wall Street Journal.

The percentage of women looking for romance is on a steep decline. According to a 2022 Pew survey, only 34% of single gals were looking for a serious romantic relationship, which is down from 38% in a 2019 survey.

Reportedly, almost 54% of women between the ages of 18-40 declared themselves as single, according to an analysis of census data by the Aspen Economic Strategy Group.

Once upon a time, women would hide their singleness, ashamed to not be settled down with kids by a certain age — but nowadays, women are celebrating it and even openly talking about it on social media.

"I don't think we give enough credit to single women who love being single because there's still the whole childless cat lady troupe out there," content creator Anne Kai said in a podcast clip posted to TikTok.

"You can enjoy life alone, you don't need somebody to bear witness to your joy to make it exist."

The hundreds of comments on the video prove this phenomenon to be true.

One commenter wrote: "Literally love being single. I move on my terms and no one else's."

"I'm afraid I like being single too much now," chimed in another person.

"I love being single, I've learned so much being by myself," a commenter agreed.

"There's been a simple but profound shift in the dating space: Women are realizing that protecting their peace is their number one priority," dating and relationship expert Danielle Szetela told the Daily Mail.

In a viral video showing 103-year-old Betty Reid Soskin, the oldest serving park ranger, being interviewed for a supposed documentary, when asked what advice she would give her younger self — Soskin replied, saying "to never marry."

"I think that I could have done all the things that I have done without a man."

As expected, many women took to the comment section to admire Soskin's candidness — and share their own story of either getting divorced or choosing to never marry.