Smoking Poo, Yeah Baby! By James Reed

     I have never smoked “dope,” but it is the drug of my degenerate baby boomer generation. Thus, I had to laugh at this one, that smokers may be smoking dried human poo, and good for them, too.

“A Spanish pharmacologist purchased ninety samples of hash off the streets of Madrid, Spain and put them under the microscope. Fellow researchers from Complutense University learned that 88.3 percent of the samples were not suitable for human consumption because they contained exorbitant levels of E. coli bacteria derived from the anuses and intestinal tracts of drug traffickers. Lead researcher Manuel Pérez Moreno says that drug traffickers are wrapping the hash in some plastic and swallowing it to get it past authorities. After the hash is concealed in their intestines, the traffickers use a laxative to get the hash out of their body so it can be retrieved and sold illegally on the streets.

Those looking for medical marijuana on the streets of Spain are actually getting their hands on regurgitated weed that is heavily contaminated with E. coli and other human waste particles. The amount of E. coli in the hash samples was 500 times greater than the maximum amount allowed by U.S. regulations for microbial contamination in regulated cannabis products. Approximately 66.4 percent of the samples contained foreign particles that aren’t naturally found in hash. Additionally, about ten percent of the hash samples also contained a mold species called Aspergillus, which can cause serious health issues and potentially death. Aspergillus is common in cannabis samples that are damp, that were not dried properly.

The dealers sell the hash in two sizes. The larger units are called “ingots” and the smaller units are called “acorns.” About 29.4 percent of the “ingots” were contaminated with high levels of E. coli bacteria. Precisely 93 percent of the “acorns” tested positive for the potentially infectious bacteria. Due to their small size, almost every “acorn” on the street is smuggled in through the digestive tract of drug traffickers. The researchers could actually detect fecal odor coming off of the “acorn” samples.  (Related: Legal weed dangers: After dealing with multiple contaminants, California has found that, like all crops, marijuana needs to be inspected and tested.) An E. coli infection can cause severe abdominal cramps, bouts of diarrhea, vomiting, dehydration, and even hemorrhaging. Patients undergoing chemotherapy struggle with a depleted immune system. If chemo patients smoke Spanish street weed to help ease the nausea that comes from the treatments, they could easily come down with a debilitating E. coli infection. The infection is more likely to occur in people with a weakened immune system and more likely to be fatal. According to Spain’s Ministry of Health, about 31 percent of Spain’s population between the ages of 15 and 64 admit that they have used cannabis at least once. Because hash is often rolled up with tobacco and smoked using a hollow filter in a “spliff,” users are routinely sucking in smoke and taking in fecal particles at the same time. Illegal street hash is now a public health issue in Spain.”

     I was not completely correct in my glee about baby boomers copping it, since it looks like all of the degenerate generations get high on dope. Never mind, anyone doing that deserves to smoke poo, and I suppose that they don’t really care anyway. They certainly don’t care about the state of the world.

Authorised by K. W. Grundy
13 Carsten Court, Happy Valley, SA.



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Saturday, 28 November 2020
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