My Kind of Wedding Reception! By Uncle Len, Gate Crasher

     A US bride has called off her US $30,000 wedding, for reasons that she is keeping to herself. She had pre-booked a swanky reception, and was left with the dilemma of what to do with the food. So, good soul that she is, she invited in homeless people: The Australian, July 17, 2017, p. 9.
    Now, as you would know, if you knew me, homeless people like me, are not the best at personal hygiene and we tend to roll in the mud and grime a bit. However, local businesses donated suits and dresses, and somewhere my US brothers and sister got in a shower. And, then it was, dive in, to boubon-glaxed meat balls, whatever that is, but it sounds meaty, goat cheese, roasted garlic bruschetta, chicken breasts with artichokes, Chardonnay cream sauce, and a great slab of wedding cake. After that, it was back to starving, so I hope the lads and lasses of the mean streets tanked up.

     The kind lady says that she does not know what to do with the wedding dress, but I am sure the homeless would know what to do. Uncle Len is not too proud, or gender challenged, to wear such an outfit while dumpster diving, or collecting hard rubbish, or bottles and cans for sale. After six months of bin action, I am sure that the ghosts of the wedding-not-to-be would be purged by the grey ooze of survival on the streets

 

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Sunday, 20 September 2020
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