If You are Unemployed, Looking for Work Like Me … By Uncle Len, New Age Sex Therapist

     Can you imagine my extreme excitement in discovering for the first time in my life, my dream job, not as a toilet cleaner, no I wasted time with that, nor as a poet, but rather as sex research officer! Let the ad speak for itself, being a highly self-assertive ad:
  http://careers.pageuppeople.com/533/caw/en/job/558192/research-officer

“Job No.:558192
Work type:Fixed Term
•    Part-time (60%), fixed term contract for approx 2.5 years
•    Located at the Bundoora Campus
•    $65,996 - $89,021 (FTE) per annum + up to 17% superannuation
The Australian Research Centre in Sex, Health & Society (ARCSHS) is one of La Trobe University’s major research centres and a globally recognised multi-disciplinary centre of research excellence for over 25 years. In the most recent Excellence in Research for Australia (ERA) assessment, the research outputs of ARCSHS received the highest rating of 5 – ‘Outstanding performance well above world standard’. Staff and students within ARCSHS examine many aspects of sexuality, sexual health and the social dimensions of human relationships, and the Centre’s major areas of research strength and interest include:
•    The health and well-being of lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and intersex (LGBTI) populations
•    Blood borne viruses & Sexually transmissible infections
•    Young people’s sexual health and wellbeing
•    Gender, sexuality and social theory
About the position
The Australian Research Centre in Sex, Health and Society at La Trobe University is looking for a Level A postdoctoral research officer for an ARC Discovery Project ‘The technological transformation of sex: Improving Australia’s response’. This project will focus on individual and cultural implications of the uptake of new digital technologies into adult sexual lives, through such things as the use of sexting or amateur film production, or the use of new mechanical devices or medical products to enhance sexual experience.
The role will involve managing recruitment of interview participants, conducting in-depth interviews, conducting cultural and media analyses, contributing to data analysis and writing academic publications. The successful applicant will have the opportunity to work alongside leading researchers in the above fields. The position is offered part time at 0.6 fraction for a fixed term of 2.5 years.
Skills and Experience
To be considered for this position, you will possess:
•    Completion or near completion of a PhD in a relevant discipline and evidence of participation in higher level study relevant to discipline or professional area.
•    Familiarity with the research fields of sexuality and gender studies, technology studies, and/or communication and media studies.
•    Experience in qualitative research methods and applying social theory in analysing research materials.
•    Evidence of experience in research and the ability to work effectively under limited supervision or independently.
•    A record of contribution to publications, conference papers and/or reports, or professional or technical contributions which provide evidence of research.
•    Effective oral and written communication skills, including the ability to interact effectively with people from a diverse range of backgrounds.
Please refer to the Position Description for other duties, skills and experience required for this position.
About La Trobe
La Trobe University’s success is driven by people who are committed to making a difference. They are creative and highly motivated, pursue new ideas and create knowledge. La Trobe is one of Australia’s research leaders, and the largest provider of higher education to regional Victoria.  Our teaching and research address some of the most significant issues of our time and we’re passionate about driving change through operational excellence to benefit the communities we serve. All La Trobe University employees are bound by the Working with Children Act 2005.  If you are successful, you will be required to hold a valid Victorian Employee Working with Children Check prior to commencement.”

     This is a fantastic opportunity for me to show that I am capable of making a worthwhile contribution to society. Isn’t the university system simply amazing? How could people like James Reed not be in love with it? Wish mew luck with my application. I am writing it up now in pencil.

Authorised by K. W. Grundy
13 Carsten Court, Happy Valley, SA.