It seems that the noble art of sheep squatting is taken very seriously in Siberia, and has been practiced for 1,000 years. Recently, Swiss archaeologist Dr Gino Caspari, 32, won the southern Siberian sheep squatting contest, achieving 104 squats with a live sheep on his back.

     Now, this seems to me to be an even better sport for Australia and New Zealand, for we are sheep obsessed too. And, I do not think it would be hard to break the squat done by Dr Caspari. Even at my age, I can knock out 1,000 body weight deep squats, and with a barbell, did 100 kgs in one set, 100 reps., about a week ago, before being admitted to hospital. So, I will eat that record, and younger guys will be light years ahead, perhaps not even needing to go to hospital afterwards.

     The major problems in the sport of sheep squatting, apart from the obvious non-cooperation of the sheep, is the sheep licking one’s neck, and deciding to go to the toilet on you. Maybe this could be solved by special sheep nappies, with sponsorship on them, like in football. Can we get sheep squatting up as a national sport to compete against the Siberians who have a 1,000-year head start on us? Will Scott Morrison rise to the challenge? Will he squat a sheep, being in form from eliminating cash? Better yet, will he squat a sheep for cash!